There is a perception that a mediated divorce will save money and time and will reduce the animosity of a divorce case. While for many people using a mediator for your divorce will accomplish all or some of those goals, it is not always true for everyone. In this article we discuss what makes a good candidate for a successful mediation and what are signs that your divorce case is not ready for mediation and could be doomed to failure.
What is divorce mediation?
Many people turn to divorce attorneys or other professionals to act as a neutral mediator for their divorce case as an alternative to each party hiring their own attorney and submitting disputed issues to a judge to make decisions for them. A divorce mediation lawyer can assist divorcing couples to understand the law as it relates to division of assets and debts in their case, understand the law regarding child support and spousal support (aka alimony), and resolve custody disputes and help them navigate negotiations on disputed issues. At Mesnik Law Group, our experienced divorce lawyers have extensive experience in all divorce and child custody issues and will assist families in coming to a mutually agreeable solution and draft all the necessary paperwork to effectuate those agreements.
What are signs my case may not be ready for mediation?
Cases in which child custody and visitation issues are highly conflicted or highly contested are frequently extremely difficult to resolve in mediation. An example is when each parent insists on being the primary custodian of the children, or one parent wants primary custody, and the other parent wants to share custody on an equal 50/50 basis. Custody disputes where each party’s position is drastically different from each other’s notoriously cause breakdowns in mediation requiring Court intervention.
A case in which one or both parties have unrealistic expectations of how to divide property can often be difficult to mediate. However, a good mediator, such as the attorneys a Mesnik Law Group, may be able to provide the information necessary to both parties to adjust expectations and narrow the gap.
In a circumstance when one spouse is not working and seeking child support or spousal support from the other spouse, a mediated resolution can be very difficult. The California Family Code sets certain expectations of divorcing spouses as it relates to supporting themselves and their children which frequently cause significant disputes in the amount of support to be paid.
Lastly, cases in which only one of the parties wants to be divorced can be a significant impediment to a successful mediated resolution. The spouse who does not want the divorce often refuses to adequately engage in the process making mediation doomed to failure.
What are Signs we are good candidates for a successful divorce mediation?
Clients who come to us having already discussed the key issues they face in a divorce tend to be ready to engage in the mediation process and significantly increase their success. By key issues we mean how share children, child or spousal support, and what to do with the house.
Parties with uncomplicated finances or relatively low assets and no children are great candidates for divorce mediation. Often, we are able to assist them with all the paperwork required to start a divorce, exchange the require documents, and conclude a divorce case quickly.
Even divorcing couples with high asset estates, or complicated circumstances can have great success using a divorce mediator if each person is ready and willing to engage in the process and accept certain compromises to ensure a successful mediation.
At Mesnik Law Group, we will always try to ascertain at the initial consultation if a case is a good or bad candidate for divorce mediation and we will share our insights with you. We will also share alternatives with you if we don’t think your case is ready for mediation.
What are the drawbacks to hiring a divorce mediator?
If a divorce mediation fails the time spent attempting to obtain a mediated divorce can end up being wasted time, causing the divorce to take longer to resolve. When time is money you don’t want to waste it.
The cost of a failed divorce mediation can negate the attempt at saving money on a divorce case. Depending on when the mediation fails, the costs could be significant if no progress was made during the process.
The benefits of hiring a divorce mediator are relatively apparent, cost savings, faster results, less emotional trauma; however, a failed mediation can have some drawbacks that should be considered.
Often a failed mediation can leave parties feeling angry and more upset than when they started the process if the other party does not engage the mediation process in good faith or is not ready to make the compromises necessary to resolve the divorce.
Conclusion
While a divorce mediation with an experienced family law attorney can result in a far more amicable divorce process and significant cost savings a failed mediation can leave you angry, frustrated, cost you more in the long run, and cause the divorce to take much longer to resolve.
This article is in no way meant to dissuade anyone from mediating their divorce because we believe that mediation is the best manner in which to resolve a divorce case. However, everyone should evaluate whether they should engage in mediation or when they should engage in mediation.
Mesnik Law Group offers a free consultation where we can assist you in determining if mediation is the correct route to resolve your divorce case or if another alternative would be better. Contact us to speak to one of our highly experienced family law attorneys about your case.